I can think of younger days when living for my life
Was everything a man could want to do
I could never see tomorrow
I was never told about the sorrow

And how can you mend a broken heart?
How can you stop the rain from falling down?
Tell me, how can you stop the sun from shining?
What makes the world go ’round?

How can you mend a this broken man? Yeah
How can a loser ever win?
Somebody please help me mend my broken heart
And let me live again, la-la, la-la, la

Written by Al Green, but recorded by the BeeGees.

“When you listen to the gleaming harmonies of the Bee Gees, you can’t help but think they’re the product of closeness between the three Brothers Gibb. But the truth is that the relationship between the three men was often fractious, with a series of ups and downs taking place over the course of a long recording career... As a matter of fact, one of their most famous tracks, “How Can You Mend a Broken Heart,” is partly inspired by the occasional brotherly rancor. This brilliant song came together, oddly enough, came about only after the brothers had almost completely broken apart... Just as the sun, sky, and rain are unstoppable forces, so too is a broken heart never completely mendable. And yet the narrator can’t help but make his plea. Please help me mend my broken heart and let me live again.”

– Jim Beviglia, American songwriter

The pain of unrequited love or the realization that a loved one doesn’t reciprocate our feelings can be intense and deeply distressing. 

When we love someone deeply, we invest significant emotional energy, time, and effort into the relationship. Discovering that our feelings aren’t returned can make it feel like all that investment was in vain, leading to loss and disappointment.

Loving someone involves vulnerability, as we open ourselves up to the possibility of rejection and hurt. When our love isn’t returned, it can exacerbate feelings of vulnerability and expose our insecurities.

It’s easy to have expectations about how our relationships should unfold based on societal norms, personal beliefs, or past experiences. When these expectations aren’t met, it can lead to disappointment and disillusionment. Rejection triggers primal instincts related to social belonging and acceptance. Feeling rejected by someone we care about can activate these instincts, leading to feelings of hurt, shame, and inadequacy.

The pain of unrequited love is a complex mix of emotional, psychological, and social factors. It’s important to acknowledge and validate these feelings while seeking support from loved ones, practicing self-care, and allowing yourself time to heal and move forward.

I never imagined that my family’s love could clash so starkly with the monochrome of rejection. Yet, here I stand amidst the shattered remnants of my heart, grappling with the bitter truth that the brother and sister I love do not reciprocate my feelings.

I hoped against hope that my deepest secret would remain concealed, buried beneath the layers of history we had built. Yet, as fate would have it, the truth refused to remain dormant. One fateful day, I bared my soul and came out of the closet trembling.

Words stumbled from me, each syllable heavy with the weight of confession. I spoke of love—love that transcended the boundaries of family and friendship, love that dared to defy the norms dictated by society that kept me in a closeted prison for decades. And on that day, as I laid bare my heart, I saw the flicker of realization dance in his eyes—a realization that shattered my world with its cruel finality; some whom I loved would not love me back.

“I can’t,” their silence whispered, their voice not even a breath amidst the wreckage of my shattered closet walls. “I’m sorry, but I can’t” would perhaps have been better than the silence I received.

For me, it wasn’t just about love—it was about acceptance, about telling the rigid standards of society to finally fuck off. To love me would mean to embrace a truth they were not yet ready to confront—a reality that threatened to unravel their belief system.

And so, I am here now, amidst the wreckage of unrequited love, grappling with the harsh reality that the colors of my affection will forever remain unacknowledged by loved ones I held dear, my blood. But even amidst the shadows of rejection, I find solace in the knowledge that love, in all its forms, is a beacon of hope—a beacon that will guide me through the darkest nights until I find the courage to paint a canvas of happiness once more.